"Tell me more about your burning anus"

I am currently sitting in the Denver Airport eating a grossly overpriced turkey sandwich trying to get my thoughts together enough to compose a semi-coherent blog post. Or even a non-coherent blog post. Really, I'm just forcing myself to write. I've been so bad about blogging lately, and it really bums me out. My story (life in NYC) is finally really starting to get good! This is the part that I really need to concentrate on! So here I gooo........

First, let me tell you more about my job. I work as a Physician Office Assistant (POA) in the Gastroenterology Service at a cancer hospital in the city. Even though I have ZERO experience in Medicine (barely got a B in Bio 101 nine years ago), somehow I actually really, really love my job. It's the craziest thing! I had no experience or education or even desire to work in healthcare two months ago, and now I go to work at a hospital every day, and I know all about colonoscopies and radiology reports, and I love it so much. This must be what it feels like when adults learn that they were adopted as children. Only not at all. Bad example. I just mean to say that I've learned so much more about myself these last few months, and apparently I love healthcare. Who knew?

As a POA, I spend most of my time talking on the phone with patients about their gastro problems. This includes, but is not limited to: bleeding hemorrhoids, explosive diarrhea, severe constipation, and the occasional burning anus. I am serious. My English education did not prepare me for these types of conversations; in fact, my own mother did not prepare me for these types of conversations. I grew up in a household where we weren't even allowed to say 'poop' or 'pee.' We didn't fart; we 'passed gas.' We didn't have periods; we had 'that time of the month.' And now, here I am having to talk to complete strangers about the color, texture, and frequency of their bowel movements. Sometimes these phone conversations are pretty gross, and sometimes they're pretty funny, but then I remember that the people I am talking to are very, very sick, and that's not at all gross or funny. It's sad, and it's serious. Remembering that and realizing how important it is for me to listen to them makes this job worth all that other shit (pun intended). Talking with patients, listening to them, scheduling their appointments, and making them feel taken care of is my absolute favorite.

The clinicians, doctors, nurses, and other administrative support are also some of the coolest, most compassionate people I've ever met. I think it takes a certain kind of person to be able to work with cancer patients every day, and it takes an even more specific kind of person who can work in the Gastroenterology service, dealing with colon cancer and doing colonoscopies all day. I think this combination makes the team that I work with especially amazing. Though, I may be a bit biased. Anyway, these are some of the things that I love about my job. It came in the nick of time and is totally unexpectedly awesome.

I kissed a lot of [job] frogs, but I finally found my [job] prince! And he's not at all what I expected.

More on this later...

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