What's a hipster and so what if I want to be one!?

Ok, I have a serious question. What exactly is a hipster? And why is it bad? Or is it? These are serious questions. I woke up this morning to accusations that a photo of me on facebook had "so much hipster going on." This comment came from a guy* who admittedly hates hipsters. In the words of Stephanie Tanner, "How rude!"

I first heard the term "hipster" a few years ago when I was visiting EH in Williamsburg, aka the mecca of NYC hipsters. I think she told me that it was bad to be a hipster, but everything that she told me about being hipster sounded pretty cool to me! I have been confused about this ever since. It's like everyone secretly wants to be hip enough to be a hipster, but no one wants to  be called a hipster, but some people very obviously are hipsters. Am I?

To answer this question, I consulted the ever-so-credible online source UrbanDictionary.com.Here are the findings of some highly scholarly research:

DEF: (n.) Hipsters are a subculture of men and women typically in their 20's and 30's that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter.

 Yes to all of those things. Especially the witty banter.

DEF: (n.) Referring to young people of around 18-30 years of age who drink cheap beer, smoke Parliaments, Lucky Strikes, or hard to obtain foreign cigarettes, and take recreational drugs, coke being the most popular. Use a great deal of sarcasm, claim to be ironic. Are usually less than 5% body fat, drink copious amounts of coffee and eat children's cereal.

 If drinking cheap beer and copious amounts of coffee makes you a hipster, then I gotta go call my grandpa...

DEF: (n.) An unwashed and ungroomed person who hates corporations and everything mainstream, yet still buys Apple products.

I shower pretty regularly, but I do love Apple!

DEF: (n.) A young adult who emigrates from a suburban or rural area to a major metropolis and sets about aggressively and semi-publicly slipping and sliding up the steep learning curve of urban culture.

Uh oh, I might be doing this... 

DEF: (n.) Basically a hipster is your modern day Amish. They don't like the trends of the world, so they shun them and live their own worthless lives.

HARSH. I'm definitely not Amish. I love HBO and my blowdryer way too much for that shit.

Basically I'm still really confused about the label hipster. I've decided that I'm just going to disregard it's existence in our always evolving lexicon and just be who I am and do what I do. Also, I'm keeping the hat. It's cute and functional and I'm going to keep wearing it.

(*In the defense of the accuser, as you can see in this photo, I was wearing a fedora and drinking a Miller High Life. And the photo was taken with iPhone's Hipstamatic photo app. These are all totally hip things).